Three weeks ago my status changed.
Instead of being a wife, companion, care giver, I became a widow.

What is a widow? Is she only half a person? The remains of what used to be a couple?
The odd person out? Always tagging along with couples?
Or hanging around with other lonely women?

What was I before my marriage? I was a person then, holding down a responsible job.
Then I became a wife, mother, grandmother, great-grandmother. Now - JUST a widow?

I am still a woman. Still a mother, grandmother, great grandmother.
Still capable of loving, caring, ministering, praying, passing on any wisdom or understanding I may have gained from my years of experience.

Also, I am thankful for my wonderful family.
When they call, visit, or take me out, I must not interpret this attention as merely sympathy or duty, but enjoy and appreciate the interaction.
While I do not wish to be a drag on their emotions because, they are also feeling deeply bereaved at the loss of their father and grandfather. I need to feel free to express my deepest feelings to them.

Although I miss my dear one intensely, I do not wish to be a wet blanket wherever I go, to obtain simpathy.
When alone my grief can be expressed by tears, and even though occasionally others may see me weep, I am sure that is a normal reaction.

I have many things for which to be thankful.
I have my health - so far; also I have a home and enough to meet my needs.
I still have my mental capacities, ability to think and to put my thoughts on paper.
Now there is time and opportunity to do things I have wanted to do, which were not available to me during my husband's illness.
All these things are precious.

Best of all, my Father God is still with me. I am NOT alone!
Jesus is my Best Friend and the Holy Spirit is my Comforter.

Life can still be sweet, even as a widow!

Honoria A. Groves

November, 1993